This is our moment to find those final answers. Going away one more time before walking away. You already sounded angry. Things have not been good with us lately.
This trip will see what's left. Is it lovers? Is it companions? Is it friends? is it nothing and never to see each other again.
The other man in my life is on the sidelines. I'm starting to get excited about him.
But I will give it may best.
I'm not missing you as a lover. Not missing being in your arms. Not missing the sex. It's not comforting or exciting anymore. It's bordering on sadness that I feel.
We are still friends. I still want to tell you things. But it was another I called before I called you. And another called me back today. Someone I had a big crush on.
But the other is busy too. More of a lover. More passion. More discussion. More listening. But it is still early days.
You sit there. I sit here.
Yes it feel like we are a world apart.
Natural process of something that was not quite lovers or a relationship turning into something that is less than friends and broken than before.
I wonder how long we will be part of each others lives.
You were never reliable. Ever. Not able to be relied on. We are just back to the way we were
It's been a long and cold and lonely winter but I see that spring is in the air figuratively. Blossoming into summer. I'm back at the start but having reached out for help, I feel I am in a much better place. Yoyo is still the same, we go forwards and backwards with moments of commitment and moments of companionship, making us happy and miserable at opposite times.
But just as work has been left behind because I wasn't happy, I feel much happier now. A new course awaits. A new life.
And who knows, a boy to meet somewhere in the world that wants what I want.
