Back on track

Its that delicate balance in the first stages of courting, every word, every gesture.

Yet we have formed a rhythm amoungst ourselves, a silent understanding that we are together.

I really like him.

Kind of feeling nervous

The worst part of dating is those moments of insecurity that you fall into. Its starts off so well and he's so into you, filling your every moment, reminding you that he's keen on you and always on his mind.

Its not like he's said otherwsie. I think this is me misintepreting experiences i have had in my life. I have in front of me a man that adores me. I just need to be patient that's all.

The thing is i hate this feeling. But in hindsite i think its more feelings i don't understand. Feelings i have not walked through. Sure in the past i have been let down but thats not a reflection of now, not a reflection of this man.

I'm sure he likes me, i'm sure he's crazy about me, i'm sure he will call.

Overwhelmed

Life was breezy and on a rollercoaster for a few days but sometimes i need a reality test.

Work is full on pressures and i have a tendency to look at the world through rose coloured glasses. So here i am awake through midnight thinking that preparation in hindsite may have helped.

Perhaps it wasn't about work or him but tonight i have one of those feelings that the world is not right. I'm comparing and making it all destructive. I have too much work to do and too much stress.  I feel a mess.

The glass of wine didn't help. The fact that i have not been sleeping does not help. I'm not sure whats wrong today.

I'll tell you tomorrow.

The other half of myself

Sometimes it seems like i am staring into the other half of myself. The spark, the chemistry, the kindness. Its unbelievable.

This is unlike anything i have felt before.

Fierce loyalty, unconditional feelings and that feeling of peace, knowing all is well in this universe of ours.

Together we complete each other.

Elusive search for that perfect man

Its was a random friday night and i was out just going through the motions, feeling slightly over it and not entirely content with the state of friendships around me. Bar hopping and eventually ending up there, spotting an old friend and striking up a conversation with his friend.

I whispered no as my friend asked me if i needed rescuing. I was having an interesting conversation, i couldn't be bothered dancing and there was a stool i could sit on. I was happy to have my chat and sip my drink.

Eventually deciding to head home i grab my friends and say goodbye. He catches me by surprise as he asks for my number. I give him what i think is the correct one and hope i didn't muck it up in between changing phones so many times. And if i did, what a nice guy but i guess i thought life would go on.

Still when he messaged with the promise of a dinner i still did not think through much. I fitted him in three weeks later for a date amongst my busy schedule.

And then it all happened. Three weeks later he had worked it all out and swept me off my feet. Its amazing how life brings forth the moment unexpected moments. He was right in front of me and as i got to know him he becomes more delicious.

I think of him all the time.

We are still in that madness of dating, of savoring moments, of knowing and not knowing. This time though i think it will work.

Its makes me think however, i never realized from first impressions who he could be? If it were not for the mutual friend i may never have spoken to him.

How many people do we overlook, underestimate in our search for that perfect man?

This is how you do it

Its how i felt as a i swooped by those girls in skimpy cloths, cheap hair dye stuck in the rain as i got into the comfort of a friends car that had arrived at the door. Or perhaps its that feeling as we cab it from the Hilton to the Marriot and wine ad dine on the waterfront. Then there's that date you meet that sweeps you off your feet, opens doors and takes you to the trendiest spot in time. Its that dress you wore that fits your curves perfectly with the right amount of class and glamour that does but turn many a head. And then there's that jog in the park where you meet your boy looking like your fresh out of a sport magazine ready to run a marathon. Its the time you spend in the air, breezing through limousine pick-ups, airport lounges and business class luxury. Then there's that career which just moves upwards and forwards where you climb the ladder barely touching the rungs.

Yes i've made it. This is how you do it.

A moment to hold on forever

So i think this time i've finally found the man. That deep connection, that feeling deep inside, that intuitive feeling where all is aligning. I stare into the world an it stares back.

Its a delicious feeling. I smile and dance around the room. You know when you meet a man that you know you can be intensely loyal with, that you know you can admire and respect, that in your heart of hearts with your intuition know is a good man.

Part of me is scared. But part of me is happy.

I'm ready for this. My ducks are all in a row - its time for me to shine.

First Impressions

Polished, Confident, trustworthy, debonair, exciting

Ticking all the right boxes - that happy feeling

So i went on a date last night and it went like a breeze. We had so much in common, so much to talk about, exactly on the same wavelength. Its not often you get in that cab to go home and you have this big bright smile on your face as a giveaway and you keep smiling.

And its perfect in a this could so work perfect way. Its not the exciting but crazily on the edge drama and excitement that is limited to moment on tropical islands. Its the perfect where you have that Jigsaw and the pieces start fitting.

Life is beautiful - just checking into let the world know.