I feel a shift is happening. I am living in luxury and an almost heaven, yet i waste so much time.
In a talk last night a monk said if you are going to do something, give it all you have got. And i am just not doing that.
I really need to get back into my meditation to get the peaceful feeling back. I feel better than i have as a younger self. Yet In my current more enlightened state i feel its time for a deeper change.
The passion for work has gone but that could be due to the situation of the business not doing well and me not having much to do. But i am enjoying a work life balance for the first time ever. Its nice in a lot of ways to pursue all these extra spiritual activities, reconnect with family and friends and even take up salsa dancing.
It's also time to say goodbye to the man who was never mine to begin with. Perhaps i have learnt all the lessons from him already. So so many that i have learnt. He has enriched my life and I, his. Sharing his knowledge of Yoga and Vendanta and i was able to let him into my world of buddhist mediation. I also got so much more from him. Appreciation for being connected with all in the world and treating everyone with kindness and compassion. To be friends with everyone.
That sounds really bad but my world was filled with the same type of successful people before him. Expanding this has brought such enrichment.
And i am sure my patience and way of approaching life has taught him things.
But our time has come to an end. Where we are holding each other back by holding on. At least i am. He is deep in meditation and will most likely find the spaciousness to let go.
I have a meditation retreat this saturday. I am really looking forward to that for some inner peace.The thing i crave the most these days. Even more that this man.
How life has changed. And all for the better.
In a talk last night a monk said if you are going to do something, give it all you have got. And i am just not doing that.
I really need to get back into my meditation to get the peaceful feeling back. I feel better than i have as a younger self. Yet In my current more enlightened state i feel its time for a deeper change.
The passion for work has gone but that could be due to the situation of the business not doing well and me not having much to do. But i am enjoying a work life balance for the first time ever. Its nice in a lot of ways to pursue all these extra spiritual activities, reconnect with family and friends and even take up salsa dancing.
It's also time to say goodbye to the man who was never mine to begin with. Perhaps i have learnt all the lessons from him already. So so many that i have learnt. He has enriched my life and I, his. Sharing his knowledge of Yoga and Vendanta and i was able to let him into my world of buddhist mediation. I also got so much more from him. Appreciation for being connected with all in the world and treating everyone with kindness and compassion. To be friends with everyone.
That sounds really bad but my world was filled with the same type of successful people before him. Expanding this has brought such enrichment.
And i am sure my patience and way of approaching life has taught him things.
But our time has come to an end. Where we are holding each other back by holding on. At least i am. He is deep in meditation and will most likely find the spaciousness to let go.
I have a meditation retreat this saturday. I am really looking forward to that for some inner peace.The thing i crave the most these days. Even more that this man.
How life has changed. And all for the better.
No comments:
Post a Comment