People have had their heart broken before, someone's heart is getting broken right now, people will have their hearts broken again in the future.
Life is wonderful. It's hard to see through the fog sometimes.
So yesterday i was in denial. I apologised for my mistakes. I tried reaching out to you. At the same time i leant on friends and family and found that i was never alone. The investment i made the last few years in strengthening these really shows when in times of hardship. From two friends that called at 3AM to listen to me cry to a friend who kept me company at 6AM so i wouldn't be alone to my mum and dad who told me to come back home for a few days so i can be looked after. Constant calls from friends and coffees and concern and talking about life.
Yes what we had was wonderful. Some things were not working. I think i made a pretty big mistake. But the thing is i did the best i could with the knowledge and communication skills i have. I realised my mistake and i apologised to you. I may have lost you and something that could have been. But in reality, i will always make mistakes and i will always look to learn and grow from them. Forgiveness and growing together are part of relationships. If you can tell me one night that your dad and me are the most important aspects of your life right now and then break up with me the next day and walk away so easily. Well then perhaps i am just idealising what i no longer have.
I woke up this morning with mixed emotion. I looked at myself in the mirror and told me i looked beautiful. I went for a walk in the fresh air and felt like throwing my arms wide, laughing with joy and tears. I'm lucky to have all that i have. I have beautiful friends and family. I am taking a year off to study and grow and develop myself even more. I am learning so much about myself. I live in a beautiful city, have no money worries, I have a heart of gold and love myself.
This is me. I'm sorry. You breaking up with me and delivered more life lessons that i thought. I realised i didn't appreciate you enough and i'll know to act differently in the future. To catch myself if i'm being silly and taking someone for granted. Someone beautiful relationship in the future will benefit from the pain of today. Will that be you and I? Will that be another? Only time will tell.
It's also made me realise a few things. That study pushes your buttons. The stress of life accumulates. You can run after the stars and one thing after another but its those that are closest to you that will be there in times of need. You brand new beamer isn't going to comfort you when your world feels like its ending. I think this has given me the reality check i needed on career. I'm not looking for the next best thing. I'm happy here in melbourne, working where i am and doing great things. I don't need to chase some elusive future when what i have here is wonderful.
At the end of it all, i think your a great guy and i'm sorry for not trying harder. But then sometimes you just need to accept that it takes two to build a future and if your willing to walk away, perhaps it wasn't all that i thought it was. Perhaps i'm not what your looking for. Perhaps your not the one that i will be sharing my life with.
Either way, Thankyou for the memories and the life lessons that i will treasure in my heart for always.
Life is wonderful. It's hard to see through the fog sometimes.
So yesterday i was in denial. I apologised for my mistakes. I tried reaching out to you. At the same time i leant on friends and family and found that i was never alone. The investment i made the last few years in strengthening these really shows when in times of hardship. From two friends that called at 3AM to listen to me cry to a friend who kept me company at 6AM so i wouldn't be alone to my mum and dad who told me to come back home for a few days so i can be looked after. Constant calls from friends and coffees and concern and talking about life.
Yes what we had was wonderful. Some things were not working. I think i made a pretty big mistake. But the thing is i did the best i could with the knowledge and communication skills i have. I realised my mistake and i apologised to you. I may have lost you and something that could have been. But in reality, i will always make mistakes and i will always look to learn and grow from them. Forgiveness and growing together are part of relationships. If you can tell me one night that your dad and me are the most important aspects of your life right now and then break up with me the next day and walk away so easily. Well then perhaps i am just idealising what i no longer have.
I woke up this morning with mixed emotion. I looked at myself in the mirror and told me i looked beautiful. I went for a walk in the fresh air and felt like throwing my arms wide, laughing with joy and tears. I'm lucky to have all that i have. I have beautiful friends and family. I am taking a year off to study and grow and develop myself even more. I am learning so much about myself. I live in a beautiful city, have no money worries, I have a heart of gold and love myself.
This is me. I'm sorry. You breaking up with me and delivered more life lessons that i thought. I realised i didn't appreciate you enough and i'll know to act differently in the future. To catch myself if i'm being silly and taking someone for granted. Someone beautiful relationship in the future will benefit from the pain of today. Will that be you and I? Will that be another? Only time will tell.
It's also made me realise a few things. That study pushes your buttons. The stress of life accumulates. You can run after the stars and one thing after another but its those that are closest to you that will be there in times of need. You brand new beamer isn't going to comfort you when your world feels like its ending. I think this has given me the reality check i needed on career. I'm not looking for the next best thing. I'm happy here in melbourne, working where i am and doing great things. I don't need to chase some elusive future when what i have here is wonderful.
At the end of it all, i think your a great guy and i'm sorry for not trying harder. But then sometimes you just need to accept that it takes two to build a future and if your willing to walk away, perhaps it wasn't all that i thought it was. Perhaps i'm not what your looking for. Perhaps your not the one that i will be sharing my life with.
Either way, Thankyou for the memories and the life lessons that i will treasure in my heart for always.
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