But i think my lust has once again misplaced my senses. This time a mess of a friendship circle where i trust neither you nor her. I keep it in not knowing what to do.
You flirted with both of us on saturday night. And then when i run off with another you wonder why things did not go your way. That moment where you held my hand and i held yours, we had a moment. Then we gave it away.
I don't trust you anymore. I don't even want to know you.
So all of this got me thinking. What is it that we should look for in a man? You know the life partner to spend the rest of your days with?
The brillient business, successful lawyer who takes charge, brims with confidence and arrogance, for these men, women are mere tokens. The world of glamour, luxury hotels and airport lounges - will they really be the ones to tend to you when your sick in bed or will they be the first to run to greener pastures. The world of extravagance plays on you, you become something else. Cocktail functions and "no spouse" parties do but breed a certain culture.
Then there are those men, down to earth, pleasant, not going to rock your world but will love you, will be there and will make your heart yearn with kindness. These are the men with backbones built of right and wrong, perhaps a little geeky, perhaps not confident or exciting.
While there won't be any running off to a tropical island at the spur of a phonecall or risking your life for that "moment" or intellectual conversations discussing the latest acquisition or takeover -- these are the men that may always be there.
So if through friends, if through work you get to have these brillient conversation where your intellectually stimulated, you get to run your own world and achieve great things, do you really need a man like that at home? Isn't it better to go for the latter and merely interact with the man who lives in stripclubs with a mistress on the side?
Is this giving up trust and hope or is this that my wild oats have been sowed...
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