Saturday, July 23, 2011

I'm afraid to have that conversation with you

For i am not sure of the answers either. I don't know what i want to ask for.

I want that fantasy love story where you just can't get enough of me. I know it takes two but i want it to come from within yourself. I want you to make yourself kind of the datable box and push all the other men out and make that box into a one man show. I want you to get to Friday and crave to see me. Right now i am a once a week romp.

Speaking to you about this could go in two ways. I could scare you off and then i will know for sure we are not meant to be, or you could reveal your true feelings and we will be on the way to exclusivity and becoming a real couple. I'm not sure if either is what i want in intensity.

I still harbour a hope that G and I may not be over. That there is some deeper connection i am meant to have with him in this lifetime.

For the moment i think i should let things be. Yes i could loose him altogether. But right now i don't think i am ready to make that move.

Yes i love him. I am falling for him. I wish he would want to see me more often. Its not enough for me to force it. I want a man that wants to make me feel special and wants to treat me like a princess. A double standard maybe................

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