At first I was a little apprehensive. I leave behind my creature comforts for a scout camp with no heating and no ensuite.
Yet it's funny. I live in luxury but I was happier there.
Yes at first I thought I should leave. So many times I just wanted to leave. Yet I stayed and each moment I became more and more peaceful until I did not want to leave.
And they say everything happens for a reason. If A had still been around I never would have signed upto this and I never would have met A who would be able to introduce me to an amazing Thai monastery that just feels right to go to in November.
And there was a moment of jealousy and upheaval when I connected back to facebook but now with loving kindness and a brain of meditation I feel good again. That everything will just work out the way it is meant to be and I need not worry about the outcome.
I just need to fantasise a little less each day about him until he disappears all together. If our paths are meant to cross again, if we can grow spiritually together, I rest assured they will cross again in some form or other than is beneficial to the both of us.
But for right now, everything is as it should be.
Yet it's funny. I live in luxury but I was happier there.
Yes at first I thought I should leave. So many times I just wanted to leave. Yet I stayed and each moment I became more and more peaceful until I did not want to leave.
And they say everything happens for a reason. If A had still been around I never would have signed upto this and I never would have met A who would be able to introduce me to an amazing Thai monastery that just feels right to go to in November.
And there was a moment of jealousy and upheaval when I connected back to facebook but now with loving kindness and a brain of meditation I feel good again. That everything will just work out the way it is meant to be and I need not worry about the outcome.
I just need to fantasise a little less each day about him until he disappears all together. If our paths are meant to cross again, if we can grow spiritually together, I rest assured they will cross again in some form or other than is beneficial to the both of us.
But for right now, everything is as it should be.
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